Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Me & The White House

I don't like confrontation. I avoid it at all costs and when I am confronted or I have to confront someone else I feel sick to my stomach. I get flushed and my hands start shaking and I get extremely anxious. Obviously that is not who I am.

So when "Anonymous" left a comment saying she didn't appreciate my lack of insensitivity regarding the "blizzard" conditions in DC, I apologized. I apologized to her and those that may have been offended by what I said. But you know what? I stand by what I said and what I still feel towards the situation. Everyone is entitled to feel the way they want to. I don't feel that Anonymous is wrong in her feelings toward me but I don't necessarily think that she was correct either.

My apology was sincere, though she felt otherwise. My point was (and I thought I made that pretty clear) was that everyone is allowed to have differing opinions about recipes, weather, politics etc. I'm okay with not seeing eye to eye with everyone. But I am a people pleaser and it hurts a little to be befriended because I blogged about the snow and someone didn't like it. She is no longer a reader of mine because I "singled" her out in my last post. But I'm pretty sure that's what she did to me by singling out one thing that I said about the weather conditions. So should I stop being her friend? I don't have that option though because I don't know who she is. And even if I knew who this person was doesn't mean I would stop liking them. I realize that I allow people to leave anonymous comments but if someone feels that strongly about a situation then why not leave your name? Stand up for what you believe in and don't feel ashamed to defend that.

And just so you know, I am half white and half hispanic. I am 28 years old. But I've been known to lie about my age because I always feel older than I actually am. So really I'm only 27. I'm married with 2 pets and live in Texas. I am a mother but do not have any living children. I drive a gas guzzling SUV and I leave the water on while I brush my teeth. I like fake mashed potatoes and I just discovered the amazing qualities of the S.O.S. pad. I am a Democrat and have been for as long as I can remember. I am pro-life but believe a woman has the right to make her own choice. I do not smoke, drink or do drugs but I occasionally cuss like a sailor. I can be lazy and my husband does all the laundry while I sit on the couch and watch. I don't go to church as often as I should but that's between my God and I. I have big feet and don't like onions or peas. I am a part time nanny and I can't stand 3 pronged forks. This is who I am. Take it or leave it. That is your choice.

87 comments:

Erinne said...

You Go Girl!!!

Tami said...

That's why we love you...and you don't even know who I am!

gin said...

Monica,
First, I'd like to tell you that we have a lot in common. I, too, let my husband do the laundry while I watch him, I too am 27 and I too live in Texas. (I also like to bake but am no where near as talented as you.)
I also have lived through blizzards during my college life at the University of Colorado in Boulder. I found no fault with your blog and found it to be as sweet and charming as ever. And this is coming from a person who has lived through severe blizzards, with no power and no water.
So, not everyone is so uber-sensitive about blizzards, and thing about all the snow, is that eventually, it melts.
Cheers!
gin

Leslie Limon said...

Yay!!! Good for you for standing up for what you believe in. And after your description of who you are, I just have to say...Monica, you are my kind of girl! I'm a reader for life! :D

Sook said...

It's good to get to know you a little better, Monica. That is too bad that you had a little conflict with one of your readers. But remember you are entitled to your opinion and I am glad that you still love your blogging friends. :)

Ruth's Photo Blog said...

Keep on being who you are.We are all different only perhaps I am more different than others.LOL.I enjoy reading your blog.
Blessings,Ruth

Keeley said...

Monica, shake off those haters! It's just snow (and to quote gin... "it melts"). You are talented and honest and I appreciate you keeping it real, but please don't feel the need to be a people pleaser. It's so not worth the stress.

Astrid said...

What an awesome post! I feel the exact same way about confrontation. I absolutely hate it! And my feelings get very hurt when I find out that I actually offended someone.It's great to learn more about you. I had no idea you were so close to my age! I just assumed you were older (30's) because you are so talented and write in such a mature way.

Peggy Clyde. said...

I love your blog and I think you are awesome!!! Sorry someone said those things about you.

VeggieGirl said...

I'm 100% on YOUR side!

dawn said...

welcome to the world of blogging! LOL. fun isn't it? out of the hundreds of haters I have, I have thousands of lovers--same holds true for you.

csr513 said...

I love reading and following your blog; you go girl!!! Pay that "anonymous" no more attention, trust me I know it's hard. It's her loss if she's so trivial about a blizzard.

Just wanted you to know that you have blog followers standing by you and supporting you.

Sue (Someone's Mom) said...

I don't like it that she pushed your buttons. I feel as you do, if someone feels strongly about something I say...at least tell me who is upset with me. It is great to know more about you. I'm a bit freaked out that you are the same age as my oldest child, but I refuse to think about that. I don't know how you can eat instant mashed potatoes...but, you have the right to choose:)

I do most of the laundry around here because I'm home now, but we have a "team" marriage and my husband will certainly do it too, and does. He cleans up dinner every night after I cook.

Now, since I'm old enough to be your mother...quit letting this person get to you!! We like you just the way you are.

Sue

ButterYum said...

You are who you are and that's good enough for me!

:)
ButterYum

Cassie said...

I have been a regular reader for some time now, but this is my first comment. I'm not one to normally write comments but I really just wanted to leave you a note and let you know that I ADORE your blog. You're a sweet, obviously caring person, and whatever issues that 'Anonymous' is dealing with, clearly have nothing to do with you.

You're fabulous. Your readers love you. Your recipes make my husband happy. I hope you enjoy the rest of your trip in DC and the beautiful snow-y ridiculous weather!

Future Grown-Up said...

Hey, you are the only you there will ever be. You were created to be uniquely you. So celebrate that...we wouldn't have you any other way. We like you just the way you are.

Jean Badgley said...

YEAH!! Good for you!! I hate confrontation too and I know how you feel when out of the blue weird topics all of a sudden become larger than life...I love this blog and I love what you have to say...thanks for sharing all that you do!! Have fun in D.C.

Beth said...

Well said! I love your blog and thank you for sharing your wonderful recipes. Don't let what one *anonymous* person said destroy your spirit.

Selba said...

Argh... don't we hate confrontation? Too bad that sometimes, there are people that really can push our buttons so badly.

Yes, I totally agreed with you that everyone is allowed to have different opinions about everything, it's our right as an individual :)

sarahe said...

yay for you! and it sounds like we have a LOT in common! be true to you and forget silly people who get offended like that!

oneordinaryday said...

I'm calling Ingrid. Where's that rolling pin, darnit?!

Keep your chin up, Monica. : ) And please tell us more about being in the White House!! I've never gotten the chance to go, but I have promised myself that I will during Obama's administration. Was it awesome?

Momx6 said...

I thought the offense was ridiculous. You were making any remarks toward anyone - just sharing your experiences in the snow. I love your blog - check it almost every day and I've tried many of your recipes. All have turned out just like the pictures! Thank you for sharing!

Momx6 said...

Sorry, typos! I meant - you weren't making remarks toward anyone

Jeanine said...

I'll take it. :)
Good for you. I totally hear you about the people pleaser. Eventually, it gets so far, you don't even know what YOU like. BTW...the snow is very pretty!

Treehouse Chef said...

Monica,

If I were you I would not invest anymore time in what that person said. Life is too short! You are exactly right and it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. I love your blog and think you have a great personality! Remeber the verse in the book of Phillipians- whatever is true,whatever is noble, whatever it excellent or praise worthy think aobut such things. That means don't spend your time thinking about anything negative such as grumpy people who leave negative comments. Love the photos you posted today! D.C. looks so beautiful covered in snow.

ThatGirl said...

Some people can be so touchy, can't they?
I really like your blog and have been following for awhile.
Thanks for the pics of D.C. The snow really looks beautiful.

Rachel (rachescakes) said...

I missed the comment, now I'll have to go back and look.

I hope you are able to make it home, of course I hear snow is headed to your area soon.

Anonymous said...

Dee from Tennessee
Well, I will ditto what Treehouse Chef said about Phillipians. I love your blog and feel the same way about confrontation. I can't believe that you're this young and are such an accomplished cook/chef/baker and a wonderful photographer to boot!
I've just recently read about Arlington Christmas wreaths-- would LOVE LOVE LOVE to visit DC one day - I love history! Thanks for your blog and stay safe!

Marie W said...

Don't ever feel that you have to apologize for what you post on YOUR blog. I never found the posts offensive in any way or thought that you were making light of blizzard. All I heard was the awe in your voice of the sheer beauty of the weather.
You can never please people all the time, so as much as you are a "people pleaser", you just have to be yourself and others will see your inner beauty and gravitate towards you. Hugs to you my friend! I hope you have a safe journey home tomorrow.

cyd said...

I live in Oklahoma and we had the "Christmas Eve Blizzard of 2009". I feel like you, two feet of snow does not a blizzard make, eventhough the wind was 60 miles an hour. Snow blowing like that certainly feels like a blizzard, but I bet everyone who lives in the upper Northern region of our country think we are all wimps down here.

As someone who has experienced similar conditions to what is going on in DC, I agree with you and think you have an entertaining and charming way of expressing your feelings. Anonymous is probably feeling the severe stress of the situation and you just happen to be easy to take it out on. Doesn't make it right, but things like that happen! Good luck in getting home!

tamilyn said...

And I love you just the way you are. And you shouldn't have to apologize to anyone on your blog-it is YOUR blog. I hate peas too. I wish my hubby would do laundry but all my pants wouldn't fit and my white socks would be pink.

Hope you are having a fabulous time!!

Michel-lee said...

I love your blog and your honesty. You're a great person inside and out.

Diana's Cocina said...

Keep your head up! Stay warm and get homw safe.

The Duchess of Wessex said...

You dear, sweet girl! Maybe it's the age difference between us - you are young and tender and I am 44-years old and have been hardened by raising the most difficult teenager on the planet, (not my US Army Ranger) but I would want to tell that coward, anonymous to STEP OFF! This is YOUR blog so if they have a problem with what you said and can only handle reading things they agree with, then they really need to author their OWN blog!

I am a Republican and I believe abortion is murder but I wouldn't ever offend you or hurt your feelings by insisting you see things my way.

Besides, I am MUCH too selfish... I could NEVER deny myself the PLEASURE of your friendship or your blog just because you don't think the same way I do or enjoy the same things. Only you can be you and only one of us can be married to my husband! Ha ha!

Keep your chin up - DO NOT give this another thought (that's an order) and know that like bulk mail, you're only going to get real agreement from 2% of those you reach!

Much love!

Gabe's Girl said...

This is a such a great post, but then again, I LOVE your site! I love learning more about the people I read. It seems at the young age of 28, I mean, 27, you know who you are! I for one HATE anonymous comments. They might as well call them "yellow-bellies", as we say in Texas!

Jana said...

I read your blog. And drool over your pictures. You are a talented and amazing woman. I know it's hard, but blow off those comments. If anonymous were serious, they would have left a name. Hard to stand behind something you believe in if you are hidden in the shadows. Sounds like you are enjoying your unexpected prolonged stay in DC. Good for you. I tend to make lemonade too...

The Duchess of Wessex said...

This just in!!

On the 10PM news just a moment ago a jogger passing the White House was asked what she thought about the weather there and she replied, "It's beautiful, I love it, so much better than running in the heat and humidity of summer."

Quick! Someone call the insensitive Police!

Mrs. A said...

I read you blogs, I love your blogs...yes both of them! Your pictures make me drool and because of that I bake a lot more than I should! And now after your who you are description I know we have a lot more in common than I thought, except maybe the laundry...but oh well!
And you know what I am all for the snow, my Husband and Brother are putting in a lot of extra hours because of it so I say Bring!It!ON! Good Luck with the flight home!

Heather said...

So sorry someone was nasty, that is truely one of my worst fears.

I just found your blog and have spent way to much time reading through it.

cjvierow said...

Monica--I may not agree with everything you say, but I'm not deleting you from my google reader just because of that! I'm also of a different political party--but that's why there's more than one. Just remember---"You can please some of the people all of the time, all of the people some of the time, but not all the people all the time." And, she is cutting her own nose off to spite her own face. So, you just keep on doing your thing--after all, like others have said, it is YOUR blog. Let anonymous start her own blog, then she can say what she wants. You just keep up the good work 'cause there are those of us who really like your blog. CJ

Megan said...

Part of being mature is accepting the fact that we all have different likes, dislikes, opinions and standards.

Always stand up for yourself, don't apologize for your opinion, and if someone doesn't like it, they can just stick it.

Shal said...

Great blog... Always stand up for what you believe in. Took me a long time to realise this single thing differentiates you from the countless anonymous small-minded people...

Memória said...

WOOHOO!! APPLAUSE!! Good for you! Now let's move on and see some more photos of yummy food! LOL!!!

BTW, I live in Texas, too!!

cookies and cups said...

Holy Schmoly! I think all that snow is getting to you :) No need to justify yourself. It is your blog. I get so many weird emails telling me that I misspelled a word or have done one thing or another to offend. You can't be everything to everyone. Impossible. Hope getting that off your chest has made you feel better! And you know "anonymous" is still reading ;)

Laura said...

Well I said where is your review of some snow cream recipes?!?! j/k
Hope you and your hubby are able to enjoy some extra time together, even if it is over ESPN fishing ;)

Sandy aka Doris the Great said...

I'm taken' you Lady! You sound just fine by me!

You haven't murdered anyone lately have you? Or tortured any little children? No? Okay -- you're in!

Christine said...

I just went back to reread your original post about the "blizzard". I have no idea how anonymous could have gotten so offended over anything you wrote. I don't think I've ever commented before but I wanted to let you know I love your recipes, stories, and pictures. Thank you for sharing all of that with us.

mbc said...

Good for you, being who you are, that's why you have so many fans. Thanks for being honest.

Keep the fantastic photos coming! I'm living vicariously through them. In Austin we have lots of rain and the temp is hanging close to freezing (thank goodness 'cause us crazy Texans don't do well in snow/ice).

bnjones said...

I enjoy your blog...I will be a reader for life...or as long as you will have me...I totally agree with everything you said and my husband also does laundry and cleans my floors, I love to bake and we have so much in common...I was thrilled that you took the time to email back and forth with me over Christmas about my cheesecakes..Thx for all you do!!! Nina

kelly said...

there's always got to be one! it is your blog. you apologized, it's all on her now!
the snow is crazy though, we live in hawaii and just can't imagine it all!

Lisa in Fort Worth said...

Monica, you are a great girl. I'm 46, my children are your age, you appeal to everyone. You are honest, open, and talented and there are alot of people who support you and enjoy everything you offer us. You are a bright spot in our journey of life!!

Maybe we should all say a little prayer for the person who is so negative, that whatever is in their life that makes them so negative and hurtful will be changed for the better.

Oh, its snowing here in Fort Worth. And it's lovely.

Lisa

katie shrum said...

I offer my support to be who you are and stay true to what you believe in...and I believe that you exhibited both!

Katie said...

I agree everyone is entitled to their own opinion. We have a lot in common, although I confess absolutely love peas and onions so maybe we would get on as long as we didn't have to cook dinner together :)

koprime said...

I'm a new follower, and enjoy your recipes. A thought? Moderate your comments and delete poisonous ones before they get inside your head. Or don't allow for anonymous!

Julie said...

Confrontation makes me nauseous too. Not sure why some people have to get their panties in a wad about some little thing. You just keep being you, we love ya!

Debbie said...

Monica you don't owe anyone an apology. You didn't say anything wrong. I always find it humorous that these type of people have to post anonymous. It is your blog (and a wonderful one) and you post and write what YOU want. Period.

A 'n D said...

amen and yay for you!!!

HoustonGurly said...

Well spoken!

Missy said...

Refresh my memory - It's YOUR blog, correct!!!!

Say what you want and kuddos for sticking with it. Also, kuddos for apologizing, even though it's not necessary!!!

Jennifer from Baltimore said...

Monica-

I'm sorry that you felt you had to defend yourself, but you did it eloquently. I knew I liked you, but since your husband does the laundry and you have big feet (like me) I like you even more.
BTW-every recipe I have made from your blog is fabulous, so my husband likes you too :)
Keep up the good work!

Debbie L. said...

I love your blog - don't worry - you can't please everyone!!!

Heather said...

How can the 'anonymous' commenter feel offended and feel like you singled them out; She/He/It/Whoever they my be, left the comment as anonymous and we have no clue who they are!?!

Second you are such a sweet, honest, and talented person! I have been reading your blog for quite sometime, and while I don't comment often I still drop by daily and have made several recipes from here (which have all turned out great).
That 'anonymous' reader is just hurting themself if she allows something like a difference of opnion to keep her from reading your blog!

My name's Gretchen said...

Goodness - I haven't checked your blog in a couple of days and so much has happened! It's too bad your comments were so misunderstood by one reader. I have truly enjoyed your reading your blog and trying out your yummy recipes. Hopefully reading these comments will be a great source of encouragement for you :)

Beth said...

Ahhh I was scrolling through and reading the comments hopeful to see a comment from your new bff! hahaha!

Very well said Monica!

Anonymous said...

Your blog sure does inspire me; it is my all-time favorite and I love every "bite" of it. Good job!

Andrew's Mom said...

I'll take it! Where we separated at birth? But I'm actually almost old enough to be your mother...hell I am.

Anna said...

The only thing I'm going to take issue with here is that you don't like peas. Really? Peas? So sweet, so green, so easy to throw into everything.

;)

I love your blog and everything you put into it, but most of all, I love your honesty. Like you, I am a pleaser and non-confrontational, so I really respect you addressing that issue. From one hand-shaker to another--I salute you (with shaky hands--ha ha).

And I love the fact that my husband also does all the laundry. We are lucky ladies, for that.

Jennifer Pemberton said...

You rock! The woman who decided not to be a reader anymore because of a disagreement about weather has bigger issues to deal with. Keep on doing what you do!

BTW - I FINALLY made the snickerdoodle bars during the snowstorm last weekend. (We're in Maryland.) My husband, who is not a big sweets person, LOVED them. He compared them to crack (or I guess what he thinks crack would be like) and has asked me every day since then when I will make more. Bravo!

Keeping up with the Freitas' said...

I love your blog and your honesty! I am from MI but live in Arlington, VA and it is amazing to see how sensitive they are to even a threat of a snow storm here! It was quite a sight to see!

Now - the big question - did you get any great meals out of your trip? I hope you did as there are some excellent restaurants here in DC!

A Feast for the Eyes said...

OK, I'm ready to put on my boxing gloves. How interesting that you are in Washington DC-- the hub of politics. Monica, I do know you and we've talked on the phone a few times. I can tell that anonymous injured your sweet self. I don't like that. For crying out loud, some people get so pushed out of shape for nothing. It's hard, but you have nothing to apologize for.
So, let it go-- and it's that person's cross to bear. It's not about you. I've been thinking about you, and am looking forward to seeing what you have cooking. Be you, because that's why you are so very popular. You are awesome!
xoxo

Anonymous said...

I'm not sure how i came by your blog a year ago but i have it saved in my favorites and look at it everyday to see your updates. in my opinion you don't owe anyone an explaination on anything you put in YOUR blog. Life is too short to worry about what other people think and waste your time and energy on explaining yourself!! This is one of the few times i have left a message on a blog of someone i don't know but i just felt the need. I live in lubbock and since you are in texas i know you know where that is. My name is traci and i had a giggle when i was reading your cuss like a sailor cause some of the things you said could be me!! ha have a great weekend....and keep the good recipes coming my way!!! Traci

Lisa said...

Monica,
It takes courage to an authentic person. I agree with Treehouse Chef....life is short. Don't give this any more of your time. People can simply be contrary. They like being difficult and griping is their hobby. And DC covered in snow is fantastic.....in 2 weeks when it starts melting it will be ugly and slushie.

Donna-FFW said...

I LOVE you and what a jerk is she. Actually she is a coward. I do not think much of people who insult then hide behind anonymous. I feel for you as I receive some vile emails and know what its like. You are well loved .. look at your support.. you are the best.. XXXOOO

nanny said...

Go Girl!!!! you are so right in standing up for yourself. Everyone has a right to read/follow a blog....if you don't like it then don't read it!!!!!

Colleen said...

Sing it sister!!!!

Love ya!!

I had no power due to the blizzard this week and I missed all the action!!

Lisa said...

I like your "about me". Very forthright. How can you not like onions, though? (wink)

Hugs,
Lisa

Kerstin said...

Ugh, I'm sorry you had to deal with those comments. I loved this post though - your blog is amazing and I'm always SO impressed by your baking skills and love how your voice shines though your posts! *hugs*

Linda said...

I have big feet too. ;) And I echo many other readers' "you go girl". You will never lack for readers, but I so understand how you feel about the one that goes against you.

Lisa said...

Hi Monica,
It sounds like "anony-turd" was trolling, which is, unfortunately, one of the downsides of putting yourself out there in this crazy world of ours (they love tearing down kindness for kicks because they are miserable people). I always just ignore that nastiness and it goes away (which is hard because I am sensitive, too). You have created a positive and lovely world of your own, and by the looks of your supportive comments, the bright light quickly cast the dark out! Keep your light shining bright - because 99.999% of us love and appreciate it!

One of LTBG's Loyal Readers/Bodyguards, Lisa

Anonymous said...

thumbs up!
of course, I agree with your blizzard comments...living in northern british columbia will do that to a person :D

Susan said...

Well said!! Sounds like you and I would get along great! Debby from Feast for the Eyes told me to "check you out". I just joined Foodie Fans of the Pioneer Woman. Don't let someone who won't even leave their name get you down.

Tamara said...

I live in the DC Metro and I read your blog. You seriously thought an anonymous poster stating they thought you were being insensitive to the weather was a personal attack? They were stating their perception after reading your blog. Instead you went on to tell them you were sorry, but they were wrong. How is that an apology? Then you went on to call them out? I will remember to never make a negative comment about your blog. Oops. I already did. I'm sure I will now be called out.

FYI: If you don't like anonymous posts, you can turn the feature off.

Mya said...

Sorry you had to deal with a sourpuss. I also hate dealing with confrontations and such.

I'm 29, hispanic and live in Texas. I love me some sweet tea and I say words like ya'll. I'm a neat freak and don't like anyone else to clean because they -in my eyes- do it all wrong. I am a fulltime student and a Mom of 2.

I am so glad I'm one of 396 followers that get to know a little about you..and share our love for food and even learn a few things in the kitchen.

Monica H said...

Tamara, I don't feel she was wrong as she is entitled to her opinion. As you are yours and I am mine. I apologized for what she thought was me being insensitive. I do not however apologize for my perception of the snow. It's just ridiculous.

No need to call you out, you already brought attention to yourself.

Thanks for stopping by!

mannadonn said...

Love it!!!!

Tanya said...

I have just spent the last 3 (THREE) hours reading your blog. I want to make almost everything you have blogged about. I was going to comment on some other posts, but decided not to. I will comment on this one. I think you're brilliantly talented. I love your sense of humor. Your pictures do your food justice. You feel real. I know you are, but you know those blogs where it just feels like someone wants to say they have a blog, so they post some stuff, but it's just stuff and doesn't come together? Well, you feel real. Like a friend who I just came across. Anyway, keep up the awesome blog, state your opinions and beliefs, and if readers do not like it, then they can chose to attempt to find another blog to troll. I look forward to reading your blog when there are new entries!

Anonymous said...

just discovered your blog. you are too funny. i am somewhat different from you. i put the water in a glass, am republican, pro-life, live in new york and blah, blah, blah. you seem like a very nice person (for a democrat, lol)!!! i will enjoy reading your blog and i appreciate that we are different. have a great day.

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